From the Inside Out

We celebrated my niece’s 16th birthday this evening with a family party at my sister’s house. It made me reflect back to the day I turned sixteen.

Sixteen is such a magical age. It’s when you start driving and that brings new freedoms and liberties with it. I guess that’s why they call it your “sweet” sixteen.

For my sixteenth birthday, I received a huge surprise — a car! I had no idea it was coming, and I was completely blown away. It was a classic ‘68 Mustang — sweet, indeed.

I took my driving test on my 16th birthday, passed the test, and drove to school for the first time. It was a major milestone in my life. I experienced many other milestones that year including:

• Winning the Student President election by one vote
• Taking first place at state for female quartet
• Traveling to New York for Nationals, singing at the Statue of Liberty
• Taking first place for a female quartet at Nationals (it was the first time one of our singing groups had even placed there)!!
• Starting my first job (gift wrapper and then sales associate at Lord & Taylor’s)
• Graduating (yeah, that’s right…I graduated a year early — it’s a private school thing.)
• My best friend moving to New York with her sister (she eventually realized that there’s no place like TX and came back home)
• Changing churches and attending ALC
• Meeting the man who would eventually become my husband

Ah, those were such great times. Sixteen was truly a sweet year.

For many kids, it’s an annual event. Their parents dress them up and haul them to the mall to get a photo taken with Santa. Many enjoy the experience, but it seems that far more find it to be terrifying.

I can remember being forced to sit on this strange man’s lap while someone snapped a picture. I’m sure my mom still has the photo of me with tears streaming down my face while this huge bearded man in a red suit held me. I never really liked Santa since I was a kid. Some people find clowns creepy; I think Santas are creepy.

Authors Denise Joyce and Nancy Watkins have found at least 250 toddlers who agree with me. The two recently published a book called “Scared of Santa: Scenes of Terror in Toyland” that shows photos of children on St. Nick’s lap — most of whom are desperate to leave. The book contains both current pictures and vintage pictures of frightened children with Santa. They have some from the ’50s and ’60s and even have some that go as far back as the ’20s. According to Nancy Watkins, “It just proves that being scared of Santa goes back many, many decades.”

The project started at the Chicago Tribune, where both Joyce and Watkins work. They asked readers to send in their photos and got an overwhelming response that’s still going strong. Last week, the Tribune’s “Scared of Santa” Web site had 2 million hits, and it contains some hilarious pictures. You can check them out here.

Over the course of my life, I’ve had many friendships. Some stay and some go, but there are a few special relationships that never change no matter what happens. Whether separated by distance or time, the connection remains. It goes beyond friendship — it’s a lasting bond, a sisterhood.

It’s been said that we do not choose our friends, God does. There’s a part of me that believes it’s true. I think God brings certain people into your life. These people are meant to share not only your joys and achievements, but also your heartbreaks, fears, and failures. They are the ones who walk in and stand beside you when it gets tough and others walk out. These are the people who are truly gifts from God.

I was blessed to meet this type of a friend early in my life. During our teens, we were inseparable. She was more than a friend; she was my second sister. And though a lot has changed throughout the years, she remains my sister. We have been through so much together, and I know she would be one of the first people to respond in a time of need. She is a courageous person, and she may not realize this, but I have learned a lot from her. I love her dearly.

Oftentimes, I take these rare friendships for granted, not fully appreciating how special they are. The busyness of my life doesn’t allow much time for relationship nurturing, yet these people stick around anyway. They love me in spite of my flaws and inadequacies. Elbert Hubbard said, “Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you.” It’s so true.

So, in today’s blog, I want to say thanks to the friends who “know all about me and still like me” anyway. Your gift of friendship is priceless.

“Are we going to be friends forever?” asked Piglet.
“Even longer,” Pooh answered.
- A. A. Milne

I’m odd. I know it. I think my “baby gene” failed to develop properly because I’m not one of those girls who are naturally drawn to babies. Even so, I have to admit that there is something incredibly special about the day a baby enters into the world.

I have celebrated the births of three nephews and one niece, as well as the births of my closest friends’ children. After nine months of waiting, I enjoy seeing the new baby, but to be completely honest, my favorite thing is watching the new parents as they look at the incredible gift that God has given to them. The mixture of joy and awe on their faces is a special sight to behold. I enjoy sitting back and simply observing their expressions. It’s neat.

We have welcomed a large number of babies into the world during the last two years — there was a major baby boom at our church in 2007 and 2008. Another special one was born today. Heidi and Cody welcomed Hayden into their family.

She weighs in at 7 pounds and 8 ounces. She is perfect and gorgeous. Heidi and Cody were all smiles.

Once again, I witnessed how special new life can be.

On Father’s day, my church gave everyone a book written by Andy Stanley, “Choosing to Cheat: Who Wins When Family and Work Collide?.”  I read it the other day, and it hit home.  The author presents an interesting premise –- everybody has to cheat. 

Think about it.  All of us have several things that demand our attention.  Whether it’s our jobs, spouses, families, ministries or hobbies, all of these things battle for our attention.  None should be neglected, but there aren’t enough hours in the day to reach our full potential in all areas.  We must make tough decisions about what (or who) gets cheated.  In fact, the author suggests the issue isn’t whether people cheat; it’s where they cheat.

Andy believes that a collision between work and family is inevitable.  As a career professional in a highly demanding industry, I tend to agree.  Work/life balance is a huge issue in the workforce today.  Companies have taken tremendous strides to enable employees to regain that balance.  They provide the technology that allows them to work from home and maintain more flexible work hours, but the challenge still exists.  How do you excel in one area without cheating the others?  Sometimes it seems impossible.

I struggle with this issue often.  I want to move ahead in my career, but not at the expense of my personal life or relationship with God.  Unfortunately, I tend to follow the pattern outlined in the book –  I cheat at home.  I invest an inordinate amount of time, energy and passion in my work.  My friends and family get the leftovers. 

I talk about what I “wish” I could do if things were different, but I begrudgingly accept the fact that this is my life – for now.  I haven’t given up completely.  I try to limit my work life by investing more in personal activities.  However, it’s just added to my problems.  Now I have even more responsibilities, and I must cheat in other areas of my life to keep up with everything that’s on my plate.  At the end of the day, I’m exhausted and frustrated.  Even worse, as I began to read the book, I started to realize I am seriously cheating God. 

My personal devotions and prayer time have suffered greatly over the last couple of years.  I go to church feeling so thirsty and dry inside.  When I feel God’s presence, I bathe in it, soaking it up like my life depends upon it.  I think it’s because my daily encounters with Him are so limited these days.  He deserves more.  I can’t afford to cheat any longer.

I couldn’t have read this book at a better time.  As I embark on what will undoubtedly be the busiest (and most critical) months of my career, I can’t forget the real priorities in my life.  I must adjust my schedule to reflect what’s most important. 

Matthew 6:33 states, “Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”  I know it won’t be easy.  There’s a part of me that still says it’s impossible, but “nothing ventured, nothing gained.”  It’s worth trying.